Nothing will quite prepare you for the experience of getting your first dog. The excitement leading up to it, the butterflies on the way to the pick them up and the utter obsession that follows after. People can say ‘it’s just a dog’ but those will a dog understand that it’s not. They’re a part of our family, our babies, our best friends. I remember the day I picked up my girl like it was yesterday. On the 11th February 2023 we drove from Teesside to Wales to get our beautiful chocolate and white pomsky, Chilli. It was a whopping 11 hour journey in total to bring her home and worth every single second.
The other day I was out for a walk with Chilli, just our usual walk around the block, nothing exciting. As we were walking along the road I seen a woman on the other side with this beautiful doberman. She just neared toward the dip in the road preparing to cross, I smiled at her, she smiled back. Overall a very normal interaction. Me and Chilli continued walking on. Then out of nowhere the doberman started barking and lunging toward us pulling the woman into the road. I of course noticed and hurried Chilli along to get her out of their sight to try calm the situation and as we did I could hear the woman shouting at the dog. You could hear the embarrassment in her voice and that made me upset. In my eyes this was a normal situation, not awkward, not embarrassing but something that happens. Dogs can be reactive. It can be every time, sometimes and even out of absolutely nowhere. This woman should not have felt in any way embarrassed in front of me and this got me thinking….
Thinking about how the world is forever painting these perfect pictures that we believe life should be and if we have anything less we feel we’re out of place, uncomfortable, embarrassed and often judged. Sadly, this is the exact same when it comes to our dogs. Now I say this with absolute certainty - life is not perfect.
People should not be judging other dogs, or their owners for their dog’s behaviour. Yes, sometimes negligence can occur with dogs and of course owners can be responsible for that but this is not what im referring too. I’m talking about all the usual scenarios like I described at the start of this. The people who feel sick with butterflies going to pick up their new little baby and want nothing but the best for them. These people are trying and sadly sometimes no matter how hard you try things don’t always go to plan. Just because a dog is reactive, unfriendly or appears disobedient this is not a direct reflection on their owner. Every dog is different, just like us. Training is not a walk in the park. Its hard - real hard and never ending. I personally find training quite fun but im lucky that Chilli manages to pick things up pretty quickly so we can enjoy it. Don’t get me wrong, she has off days and absolutely ignores the crap out of me sometimes, especially when she’s too excited. But yeah, overall we have fun. Saying this though I totally get training is a different experience for every dog, it doesn’t always go smoothly and just like humans learn things differently, so do dogs. It can take different times, different methods, etc. Like I said, it’s hard. But again emphasising the point that this is no reflection on the owner. I guarantee that some owner’s have tried everything to overcome whatever problem their dog is facing, often wanting to pull their hair out cause nothing seems to be working, but this is just how it goes. I could hear this frustration in the woman’s voice on that day. At the end of the day, judgement should never be made, FULL STOP - It’s as simple as that.
The weirdest part of all this and that this had happened on that particular day is that I was going to see a professional dog trainer for the first time with Chilli literally an hour after that. I was slightly nervous about this: nervous what he’d say, thinking what if I’d been doing things wrong, what if he’d judge me. Obviously that didn’t happen, he trains dogs because he wants to help the dog and their owner, not judge. Chilli has issues with men, nothing has ever happened to make her that way she just seems to not like them, a true girls girl which is cute to say but the reality is we need to find out why she’s like that and help her past it because we have a lot of male friends. She also has problems with overstimulation and hyperactivity. Yes she’s a Pomsky so of course that’s a given but she kind of goes beyond this. You can visibly see when things get too much for her and she almost flips and cannot calm down. With her passing 1 year old we decided to go see a professional trainer to work on things while she was still young. I can definitely say it was the best thing we did, for both her and us. We learnt so many things we hadn’t even thought about and seen a dramatic improvement even within the 2 hour session we had. She’s in the process of learning when things overwhelm her rather than play up to them, she needs to just sit or lay down and just chill out really. So far she’s doing really well and she’s already so much better at dealing with things.
So yeah, my point of telling you all this is pretty much that getting a dog is not all sunshine and rainbows, its hard work. I’ve had many a meltdowns and I’m not embarrassed to share that because the truth is I imagine many of you have too. We shouldn’t be judging each other for anything, if anything we should helping each other! We should be giving tips that we’ve found worked when we see or hear something is up but also gracefully accept it if our advice isn’t taken and they do something else because not every thing works the same way for every dog. There is no right or wrong way to raise and handle your dog. At the end of the day you know your dog better than anyone, you love your dog more than anyone and you will do what is best for your dog and nobody other than you should have an opinion on that.
A new instagram account has started up recently called the Spicy Dog Club. They have started it as a social space for reactive dog owner’s to have a safe space to talk, share their experience and above all try help each other. I thought it would be perfect giving them a shoutout here and hopefully spread the word for the amazing thing they are doing. We asked them to write a little something for you all:
Hi there! We are the Founders of The Spicy Dog Club! Katie with pups Duke, Poppy & Olive and Elliw with pup Jake. We are bringing together reactive, nervous, spicy dog owners to share their story, so that we can celebrate the progress and successes we achieve together. And also acknowledge the challenges! The Spicy Dog Club was originally what one of the founders wanted to call their dog walking business, but instead decided on naming it after their original formerly spicy boy. Then the idea came about for this page a safe place to share stories, interact with others that are going through or have had similar experiences and just somewhere with no judgements on your dog, your management of them and your training methods- we live and let live here. There is also an eventual aim to hopefully build a list of recommended contacts whether it’s trainers, walkers, pet sitters, product recommendations and generally anything that has helped both us and our dogs. Also a place to share general training or behaviour management tips with each other and most importantly a place of positivity instead of shame. This is something I personally could have really benefitted from a few years ago when I took on a man hating, dog hating nearly 40kg bully mix. I wish I had documented our journey more but at the time I was more focused on hiding these issues and walking him at times and places where I knew we’d see nothing and no one. Three years later and I’m at the place I could never have dreamt of with him, but oh how I wish I had done so many things differently and felt less ashamed or embarrassed by his reactions, but we live and learn and can hopefully build a community of support for each other. There is a forum In our insta bio @thespicydogclub for you to share your story! Judgement free! No unsolicited training advice, no criticism, just support and a chance to connect with people going through a similar experience!
That’s what our brand is truly about not just focusing on pretty pictures and laughing at silly faces our dogs pull but the reality of having a dog and that reality is that it is hard sometimes. No dog is perfect. As much as chilli is my absolute baby and I adore every bit of her she is far from an angel and why should she be? Humans aren’t angels either, we aren’t perfect. Everyone has flaws but that’s what makes us who we are and it’s the same for dogs. They can’t be expected to like everyone and constantly be in a good mood that is unrealistic. Do you like every single person you meet and enjoy spending every second with them? Constantly have a huge smile on your face and never get irritated or snap at someone when you’re feeling a little stressed? Of course not.
We’re a baby brand really, we’re brand new to the scene and currently in the process of growing in the community and as we grow this is the message we wanna send out with us - to promote not just positivity but promote reality!